11 Signs You May be a People Pleaser

Do you often feel like you are trying to please everyone? Are you always the go-to person in your group of friends to help out with projects? If this sounds like you, then it’s possible that you may be a people pleaser. This blog post will explore 11 signs to determine if this is true for yourself or someone else.

What is a People Pleaser?

People pleasers often put other people’s needs before their own. This means that they let others influence the decisions they make, say yes to things when they want to say no, and never stand up for themselves because it might upset someone else.

People-pleasing is a common trait in many who suffer from low self-esteem or have an intense fear of rejection.

Who are People Pleasers?

People pleasers can be found in all different types of people; young or old, male or female, outgoing or shy, and any culture/ethnicity.

The commonality amongst them is that they always put other’s needs before their own to the point where it becomes detrimental to themselves mentally and emotionally.

11 Signs You May be a People Pleaser 

1. You are afraid of disappointing your friends.

When you have friend drama, it’s easy to want to take on all of the blame so that you don’t hurt anyone else or cause conflict in the friendship group. This can be a problem because when you do this, it can build resentment towards yourself and lead them to think less of you as a friend.

Don’t be afraid to speak up and own your part in a conflict. This can be hard, but it will help you keep good friends that won’t resent you for taking the blame when it’s not always yours to take.

2. You feel guilty when you don’t help.

When someone asks for your assistance, it’s easy to want to drop everything and go right away because of the guilt you’ll be feeling if you turn down their request.

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This can sometimes make others think that they are more important than everyone else or that their needs are always going to be met first which can create resentment.

You should not feel guilty when saying no to someone’s request. When you say yes all of the time, it can create resentment because others will think that their needs are always going to be met first or that they’re more important than everyone else.

3. You are frustrated with saying yes all the time

It can be extremely frustrating to feel like you always have to give in and say yes when someone asks for your assistance or makes demands on you because it’s easy to forget that sometimes they need help as well.

This is especially true if most of the time, others will take advantage of this quality of yours and use it against you.

being a people pleaser

4. You’re afraid of conflict.

When you don’t want to cause any type of drama or conflict, it can be easy to go along with what someone else wants instead of standing up for your own beliefs or rights.

This is especially true when dealing with people who are controlling and manipulative because they will exploit this quality in order to get their way all of the time.

5. You’re afraid to stand up for yourself

Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself when dealing with people who are controlling or manipulative. This can be hard, but it will help you keep good friends that won’t resent you for taking the blame when it’s not always yours to take.

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It is extremely frustrating to feel like everyone takes advantage of your kindness and generosity all of the time. This is especially true when you don’t want to cause any type of drama or conflict and have a hard time saying no because it’s not always easy to speak up for yourself.

6. You feel guilty when you say no to people.

When someone asks for your assistance, it’s easy to want to drop everything and go right away because of the guilt you’ll be feeling if you turn down their request. This can sometimes make others think that they are more important than everyone else or that their needs are always going to be met first which can create resentment.

7. You’re often confused about what you want.

When other people constantly ask for your assistance or make demands on you, it can be hard to know what it is that you want. This can sometimes make situations even harder when someone asks for help because they may not realize the impact this has on you if everyone else just takes advantage of your kindness and generosity all of the time.

It’s easy to feel like other people are more important than you or that their needs are always going to be met first when other people constantly ask for your assistance.

This can make situations even harder if someone asks for help because they may not realize the impact this has on you and it’s hard to know what it is that you want sometimes.

8. You don’t see the problem with trying to please everyone.

When you’re empathetic, it can be easy to want to go out of your way and do anything for anyone without thinking twice about how this makes you feel or what it says about you as a person. This is especially true if most people take advantage of this quality all of the time.

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Don’t let other people take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

9. You feel like you don’t know who you are anymore.

When people’s needs and wants always trump yours, it can sometimes be hard to figure out what your own wants and desires even are because they’re always being sacrificed for other people all of the time. This is especially true if most people take advantage of this quality that you have in order to get what they want.

10. You feel like other people resent you, but they actually don’t care at all.

When someone makes you feel guilty for not helping them or doing what they want, it’s easy to assume that this has something to do with your personality.

However, the truth is most people don’t care about someone else being kind and empathetic because if they did then they wouldn’t take advantage of their kindness all the time.

11. You’re always making sure everyone is happy.

You want everyone to be happy and you might go out of your way to make sure they are. This, in return, could be at the cost of your own happiness because you’re always sacrificing your own needs for other people’s all of the time.

Final Thoughts

 If you’re reading this, chances are that at least some of these points resonate with you. Don’t worry – there’s no need to be embarrassed about it! We all have our quirks and foibles.

That said, if your people-pleasing habits are causing problems in your life (like feeling exhausted or stressed out), it may be time for a change.

Rebecca

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