How to Cut Someone Off: A Guide to Ending Toxic Relationships

It’s never easy to cut someone off, especially if you’ve known them for a long time or have a close relationship with them. However, sometimes it’s necessary to sever ties with someone, especially if they are toxic or abusive. In this article, we’ll provide a guide on how to cut someone off and move on with your life.

Why You Need to Cut Someone Off

It’s important to reevaluate your relationships from time to time. It’s easy to get comfortable or complacent in a relationship, but if it’s toxic or unhealthy then it may be necessary to cut someone off and move on with your life. It could be hard to recognize the signs of a toxic relationship, but if someone is constantly criticizing or belittling you, has a negative attitude, or isn’t supportive of your goals and ambitions, then they may be toxic.

Signs that you need to cut someone off include:

• They disrespect your boundaries.

• They make you feel devalued or disrespected.

• They are manipulative or controlling.

• They make you feel taken advantage of.

• There is a lack of trust in the relationship.

• You are constantly feeling drained by their presence.

5 Steps to Cutting Someone Off

1. Determine why you want to cut the person off

By determining your reasons for wanting to cut someone off, you’ll have a much clearer idea of the steps that need to be taken. It can be helpful to write down your reasons, so that you can refer back to them when necessary.

2. Communicate your decision to the person

Once you have determined your reasons for wanting to cut someone off, it’s important that you communicate this decision to the person. You don’t need to go into detail about why you’re making this decision; simply explain that things are not working out and that it is best if you both part ways.

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3. Be firm and clear about your boundaries

When cutting someone off, it’s important that you are clear and firm about your boundaries. Explain to them what behavior is unacceptable and make sure they understand that it will not be tolerated. Additionally, make sure you take the necessary steps to protect yourself from any further contact by blocking their phone number or email address, if applicable.

4. Cut off all forms of communication

In order to fully cut someone off, you’ll need to sever all forms of communication. This means unfriending or blocking them on social media, deleting their number from your phone, and no longer responding to any emails or text messages they send. It also means avoiding any contact with mutual friends who may try to pass along messages from the person.

5. Take care of yourself after the cut-off

Once you’ve cut someone off, it’s important that you take care of yourself. Make a list of activities and people who make you feel good, and spend time focusing on them. Additionally, don’t be afraid to talk to a therapist or other mental health professional if you are struggling with the transition.

How to Communicate Your Decision

  • Choosing the right time and place to talk

It’s important to choose the right time and place when communicating your decision to cut someone off. Choose somewhere you both feel comfortable, private and free of distractions, such as a quiet cafe or park.

  • Expressing yourself clearly and calmly

Expressing yourself clearly and calmly is key when communicating your decision to cut someone off. Be sure to use a firm, yet respectful tone and avoid using language that could make the person feel attacked or belittled. Stick to the facts and make sure you express your point of view without being aggressive or dismissive.

  • Avoiding blame and anger
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Avoiding blame and anger is essential when cutting someone off. It may be difficult to do, but try to avoid assigning blame or getting angry during your conversation. Instead, focus on expressing how you feel and why you need to make this decision.

Dealing with the Aftermath of Cutting Someone Off

Coping with guilt and doubt

You may feel guilty or doubt your decision after cutting someone off. It’s important to remember that this is a necessary step in taking control of your life and protecting yourself from further harm. If you’re struggling with these feelings, it can be helpful to speak with a therapist or trusted friend.

Handling reactions from family and friends

Family members and friends may have strong reactions to your decision to cut someone off. It’s important to remind them that this is a personal choice and that you need their support in order for it to be successful. If necessary, explain the reasons behind your decision and ask for their understanding.

Coping with feelings of loneliness

You may experience feelings of loneliness or disconnection after cutting someone off. It can be helpful to stay busy and focus on surrounding yourself with people who are supportive and positive. Additionally, don’t forget to take time for self-care and do things that bring you joy.

Learning from the experience

Finally, try to learn from the experience by reflecting on what you could have done differently. Consider how your actions may have contributed to the situation and what you can do in the future to avoid similar situations. This can help you become more aware of your own behavior and enable you to make better choices going forward.


Cutting someone off is never an easy decision, but it’s sometimes necessary for our own well-being. By following the steps outlined in this guide, you can end toxic relationships and move on with your life.


What if the person tries to contact me after I’ve cut them off?

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It’s important to remain firm and consistent with your boundaries. If the person continues to contact you, consider seeking legal help or a restraining order.

Is it ever okay to cut off family members?

Yes, if a family member is toxic or abusive, it’s important to prioritize your own well-being and safety.

How can I tell if a relationship is toxic?

Signs of a toxic relationship include emotional abuse, manipulation, control, and disrespect.

Will cutting someone off make me a bad person?

No, cutting someone off is an act of self-care and self-respect. It’s important to prioritize your own well-being.

How do I know if I’ve made the right decision in cutting someone off?

It’s normal to feel doubt and guilt after cutting someone off, but if the relationship was toxic, you’ve made the right decision for yourself.